yazilimweb tasarim

The Blog

EmpowerHer

Father, mother and baby: Family on the beach

The Importance of Talking to Your Children About Consent and Respect in Relationships

Discussing Consent and respect in relationships with children

Discussing Consent and respect in relationships with children. Photo: Pixabay

As parents, it’s our responsibility to equip our children with the knowledge and skills they need to navigate the world with confidence and respect. One of the most important lessons we can impart is the importance of consent and respect in relationships.

Consent is a fundamental principle in all forms of human interaction, but it’s particularly crucial in intimate relationships. It means that all parties involved have freely and enthusiastically agreed to engage in a particular activity. By teaching our children about consent, we are not only helping them build healthy relationships, but we’re also helping them understand the importance of respecting others and themselves.

The conversation about consent and respect in relationships should start early, and it should be ongoing. Here are some tips for talking to your children about these important topics:

Start the conversation early

Don’t wait until your child is a teenager to start talking about consent. The younger they are, the more they can internalize the concept and apply it in their relationships later in life.

Here’s an example of how you could start a conversation about consent and respect in relationships with children:

You: Hey kids, can we have a chat about something important? It’s about relationships and how we treat each other.

Kids: Sure! What is it about?

You: It’s about consent and respect. Have you heard those words before?

Kids: Yes, a little bit.

You: Great! So, consent means that everyone in a relationship has the right to say yes or no to physical touch or other activities. It’s important to always ask for and respect someone’s decision.

And respect means treating others the way we want to be treated, with kindness and understanding. In a relationship, this means listening to each other, being honest, and supporting each other.

It’s important to understand and practice these things now, so that you can have healthy relationships in the future. Do you have any questions or anything you’d like to add?

By having this conversation, you can lay the foundation for children to understand the importance of consent and respect in relationships, and empower them to make informed decisions in their own relationships in the future.

Use age-appropriate language

Make sure your language is appropriate for your child’s age and developmental stage. For younger children, you might use simple language and analogies to help them understand the concept of consent.

When speaking to kids about relationships, it’s important to use language that is appropriate for their age and level of understanding. Here’s an example of age-appropriate language when talking to kids about relationships:

For younger kids (ages 5-7): “A relationship is when two people love each other and want to spend time together. Just like how you love your family and friends, people can love each other in a special way too.”

For older kids (ages 8-12): “A relationship is a special connection between two people who care about each other. It’s important to treat each other with kindness and respect, and to be honest and open with each other.”

It’s also important to emphasize the importance of healthy relationships, where both people feel happy and respected, and to discuss ways to identify and address any problems that may arise in a relationship.

Emphasize respect

Teach your children that respect is a cornerstone of all healthy relationships. Emphasize that consent and respect go hand in hand, and that respecting others’ boundaries is essential.

Discuss what healthy relationships look like

Help your children understand what a healthy relationship looks like by sharing examples and having open and honest conversations. Talk about what it means to listen to others, communicate effectively, and resolve conflicts in a respectful manner.

Use real-life scenarios

Use real-life scenarios to illustrate the importance of consent and respect in relationships. For example, you might talk about a time when someone didn’t respect your boundaries, or a time when you didn’t respect someone else’s.

Encourage open communication

Encourage your children to come to you with any questions or concerns they may have about relationships, sexuality, or any other topic. By fostering open communication, you can help them feel comfortable discussing these topics and seeking help when needed.

Lead by example

Children learn by example, so make sure you’re modeling healthy relationship behaviors in your own life. Demonstrate respect, active listening, and effective communication in your interactions with others.

By talking to your children about consent and respect in relationships, you’re helping to equip them with the tools they need to navigate the world with confidence and respect. Additionally, you’re helping to create a culture of consent, where all parties are treated with dignity and respect.

In conclusion, it’s never too early to start talking to your children about consent and respect in relationships. By starting the conversation early and using age-appropriate language, you can help them internalize these important concepts and build healthy relationships throughout their lives. Remember, the goal is to foster open and honest communication, emphasize respect, and lead by example. With your help and guidance, your children can grow into confident, respectful individuals who know how to navigate the world with grace and ease.

ARVs for women Efavirenz

COVID-19 Pandemic Must Not Interrupt Our HIV Treatment

ARVs-HIV-Drugs-Shortage

ARVs-HIV-Drugs-Shortage (Image credits: Arise TV)

Stigma can lead to foolish choices. I once made a choice that destroyed my immune system. Typing this article using my left hand is not an act of bravery but a constant reminder of the stigma that I entertained almost two decades ago. Every month, the shame I felt picking up my free essential drugs (cotrimoxazole) to manage my HIV. 

Due to my father’s constant questions regarding what the drugs were for, I would stock them up for the garbage heap. Though I wanted to take the pills, I did not want my family to know about my HIV status. The privacy of our single-roomed slum house could not allow me to hide my drugs for long. Yes! I would throw my unused pills away every month to protect my secret. And yet, I would still go for my refills each month to maintain the façade of being a ‘good patient.’ 

But my secret shortly revealed itself because I contracted toxoplasmosis, an opportunistic infection of the brain—a condition which I could have prevented by taking my medication. Opportunistic infections take advantage of weakened immune systems and are common in persons living with HIV. This led me to lose the use of the limbs on my right side, a permanent disability. Try explaining to people why a 20-year-old would suffer a stroke, and they start piecing together the puzzle. 

But this is not about my struggle with self-stigma. It is about the essential life-saving drugs that have been freely accessible for People Living with HIV (PLHIV) for years but are now stocking out of many clinics across Kenya. Cotrimoxazole DS tablets, or septrin, is one such drug that prevents over 40 opportunistic infections in people living with HIV, including pneumonia, meningitis, and herpes zoster. 

One of the challenges since the onset of the COVID-19 pandemic a year ago has been the availability of drugs to treat HIV. There has been a shortage of Septrin tablets for adults, septrin syrup and nevirapine for babies born to HIV positive mothers. During my quarterly visit last year, I confirmed this with the KEMRI FACES clinic, the Comprehensive Care Clinic I attend. 

Kenya’s stock outs can be attributed to two reasons. First are the supply chain disruptions caused by COVID-19; resources are being directed to fighting COVID-19 while sidelining other diseases. Second is corruption in the health sector, causing foreign donors to mistrust the accountability of Kenya’s government. 

Since mid-January, HIV drug donations from the US Agency for International Development (USAID) have been sitting at the port of Mombasa. The crisis escalated this year because the Kenya Revenue Authority imposed 90 million Kenya shillings in taxes to clear the Sh1.1 billion consignment. USAID did not follow HIV and tuberculosis drug donations protocols by using the American firm Chemonics as a consignee instead of KEMSA. Usually, for drug donations to qualify for an exemption, they have to be passed through KEMSA, the protocol for HIV supplies. 

In March, I went for yet another drug refill. My heart sank when the pharmacist at KEMRI mentioned that there was a stockout of ARVs. I had to take just one bottle that lasted a month instead of the usual six months. It means having to go back to the clinic several times for refills, uncertainty caused by rationing of drugs – not sure whether I will get the medicine the next time I go to my clinic, and the fear of COVID exposure every visit.  

I have been taking cotrimoxazole alongside my anti-retroviral drugs (ARVs) since January 2005 and getting it for free. Strict adherence has brought me to the stage where my viral load is undetectable. I still take my ARVs daily for the virus to remain undetectable, but I do not need to take cotrimoxazole. Now the drugs I used to throw away are difficult to find, even for people who can buy them. I sympathize with many others with low immunity and cannot afford to purchase cotrimoxazole.

HIV activists lobbied online to push the Ministry of Health to intervene with a tax waiver. As a result, a press release on 6th April promised to restore the multi-month dispensation of ARVs in Kenya. The shortage persists in several clinics around Kenya because USAID wants to control the distribution of the drug. They are now considering shipping the donations at the port to another country

The release also said that the Ministry is considering other options for funding HIV treatment. Alternatives for funding HIV treatment should consider this fact: Most people living with HIV whose lives depend on these drugs are either unemployed or under-employed and cannot afford healthcare on top of their daily sustenance. They, therefore, cannot afford to buy ARVs and other medications to treat or prevent opportunistic infections. All of this in-fighting amongst agencies impacts real lives, including mine. 

I am worried about reversing the gains over the years in fighting HIV/AIDS. Until 2018, sub-Saharan Africa has seen declines in both mother-to-child transmission and new HIV infections. Unfortunately, the WHO projects 534,000 Aids-related deaths in the region due to COVID-19-related treatment disruption and warns that nearly 70 countries might suffer shortages due to COVID-19 supply chain interruptions. 

Eighteen years ago, my 5-month-old baby died of HIV-related complications, partly because of my not taking drugs properly. I am now HIV positive and pregnant. Life has granted me a second chance to ensure I have an HIV-free baby, and stigma no longer plays a part in my decisions. I appeal to the Kenyan Ministry of Health, Kenya Medical Supplies Agency (KEMSA) and all donor agencies involved in purchasing and distributing HIV treatment supplies. Consider the gains you have made so far, reconcile your differences, release our ARVs, and restore their distribution countrywide. 

Juliet Awuor Otieno is the founder of Mwanadada CBO, a social enterprise that provides teenagers in Kenya with age-appropriate, comprehensive sex, reproductive and mental health education. She is a 2021 Aspen New Voices Fellow.

 

Large Africa study makes important breakthrough in HIV prevention

Large Africa study makes important breakthrough in HIV prevention

Long-acting cabotegravir injections once every eight weeks was better than the daily tablet used for HIV prevention.
Shutterstock

Sinead Delany-Moretlwe, University of the Witwatersrand

Women make up more than half of the people living with HIV around the world. Young women between the ages of 10 and 24 are twice as likely to get HIV as young men in the same age group. In East and Southern Africa young women will acquire HIV on average five to seven years earlier than their male peers.

Researchers have been working hard to find effective HIV prevention measures.

Most notable is the pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP) pill known as Truvada. This is a combination of two antiretroviral drugs – tenofovir and emtricitabine. This can be effective in preventing HIV acquisition. But taking a pill every day is not practical for many people.

Scientists from the HIV Prevention Trials Network recently found that a PrEP regimen of long-acting cabotegravir (CAB LA) injections once every eight weeks was better than the daily tablet used for HIV prevention. Ina Skosana spoke to Sinead Delany-Moretlwe, a research professor at the University of the Witwatersrand in South Africa and director of research at the Wits Reproductive Health & HIV Institute to find out more.


Can you tell us about the study?

This study, known as HPTN 084 is the first one to compare the efficacy of two HIV prevention or pre-exposure prophylaxis regimens.

The first regimen consisted of an injection of the long-acting antiretroviral drug, cabotegravir given every eight weeks. The second regimen was the daily oral dose of Truvada. Truvada has been shown to be highly effective for HIV prevention when taken as prescribed in a variety of populations and contexts.

We enrolled over 3,200 sexually active, HIV-uninfected cisgender women at 20 sites in seven countries. Research took place in Botswana, Eswatini, Kenya, Malawi, South Africa, Uganda, and Zimbabwe between November 2017 and November 2020.

Our study randomised participants to one of two arms. One arm received active cabotegravir and a Truvada placebo. The other arm received active Truvada and placebos for cabotegravir. Cabotegravir was administered daily by mouth for 5 weeks and via intramuscular injection at 8-weekly intervals after an initial 4-week interval load.

What did you find?

Preliminary findings show that overall 1% of participants were infected with HIV during the study period. This suggests that both cabotegravir and Truvada are highly effective for HIV prevention in this population.

The 34 incident infections detected in participants assigned to Truvada is equivalent to an incident of 1.79%. And the four infections detected in the participants assigned to cabotegravir is equivalent to an incidence of 0.21%. This confirms a new prevention option for women that offers a significant advantage over existing oral PrEP which requires consistent daily use and is associated with significant adherence challenges.

We observed roughly 9 times the number of incident HIV infections in the Truvada arm compared to the cabotegravir arm. This finding suggests that cabotegravir is much more effective than Truvada in preventing HIV infection in women. And the threshold for early stopping of the trial was met. Based on these findings the independent data and safety monitoring board recommended that the blinded portion of the study be stopped early and the results released to the scientific and broader community.

An earlier sibling study in cisgender men and transgender women called HPTN 083 showed similar results. A prep regimen containing long-acting cabotegravir injectable once every 8 weeks was superior to the daily oral Truvada in that population.

What are the next steps?

The study results are important and timely as more methods to prevent HIV among women at higher risk of HIV are urgently needed. These include methods that do not depend on daily or near-daily pill-taking, condom use or abstention from sex. The development of alternative methods to prevent HIV, and more adherence-friendly schedules than are currently available, will increase the HIV prevention choices and acceptability for women and reduce new HIV infections.

We have communicated with the research ethics committees and national drug regulators overseeing this study, and site investigators and study participants are being notified about the results as soon as possible. Participants will be able to learn about the medication that they were receiving. A protocol amendment will be submitted for regulatory review to allow participants to continue taking their assigned medication or to switch to cabotegravir if they choose.

Participants on Truvada will be offered cabotegravir as soon as the medication can be made available. All participants will be asked to continue on the study. And if they chose not to remain on the study, they will be referred for the best locally available HIV prevention services. We look forward to presenting these results in a peer-review setting at upcoming conferences as we finalise the primary analysis.The Conversation

Sinead Delany-Moretlwe, Associate Professor and Director: Research at the Wits Reproductive Health and HIV Institute I, University of the Witwatersrand

This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article.

Access to Child-Friendly Justice in Africa on the Day of The African Child

Day of the African Child

Day of the African Child Credits: Zach Lucero- Pixabay; Featured image: Trevor Cole- Pixabay.

Defilement, murder of three-year-old girl, by her mother’s lover in Kabisoge village in Bomet. The shooting of a 13-year-old boy by police enforcing the curfew in the prevention of COVID-19. News headlines we should never see if everyone is committed to the ideals of the Day of the African Child. 

This day addresses different issues affecting children in the society, and this year’s theme is “Access to Child-Friendly Justice in Africa”. Apart from the injustices committed against children, there are also children detained in juvenile corrective facilities.

An example is the Romeo and Juliet laws which involve sex between two minors. Mostly, the older minor bears the burden of guilt. I witnessed such stories during our visit to Kamiti Juvenile boys’ facility in 2019. I remember a 16-year-old boy who had spent six months in custody for the crime of defiling a 13-year-old girl, while he swore his innocence. Such are the cases that call for child-friendly justice in Africa. 

History of the Day of the African Child

Commemoration of The Day of The African Child has been each year since June 16th, 1991. It was initiated by The Organization of African Unity, honouring the children who participated in the Soweto Uprising in 1976. About 10,000 black school children marched in a column more than a half a mile long in Soweto township of South Africa protesting against their poor quality of education, leading to the shooting of hundreds during those protests.

Day of the African child is vital to Mwanadada because we highlight issues of Teenage Sexuality and encourage parents to initiate the conversations surrounding sexuality with their children at an appropriate age. Some aims of our approach are to ensure the protection of children against sexual abuse, raise awareness of the consequences to unsafe actions and that children grow up in an emotionally safe environment.

 Child protection is everyone’s responsibility. Let us join hands to realize child welfare goals as parents, educators, and community, as espoused in the African Charter on the Rights and Welfare of the Child.

Economic impact of COVID-19 and Donations

COVID-19 Donations

COVID-19 Donations (Image credits  zameen)

Lately, there have been several appeals for donations to assist the needy people in our society. COVID-19 has just brought the vast economic disparities that existed to light. There have been more job cuts, and families have lost their livelihoods in the wake of the containment measures set by the government.

The Kenyan government has put in place economic stimulus efforts. Some of which are failing due to the culture of corruption. It emerged that they had to change tact from the initial plan of giving food donations, to cash transfers, after they discovered that brokers were stealing donated foodstuffs.

Ever since the government directive for coordinated donations of foodstuffs through the Kenya COVID-19 fund, I have been asking myself how they will identify people in need of these donations and make sure these donations reach them. One of my fears was that the contributions would end up not benefiting the intended beneficiaries. The directive for coordinated food donations was introduced by the government in good faith, since personalities were taking advantage of the situation, putting the lives of the people receiving the COVID-19 donations in danger of infections and death. The deaths of two women from a stampede are what prompted this directive.

Then there’s the issue of branding donations with our photos. I don’t have to mention names of people who have this philosophy. It all goes to reducing human suffering to a commodity. Let’s look at it from an economic angle, shall we? They can use the money spent on branding to buy more of the donations to help more families in need. I am aware that they may counter my argument with they are creating jobs by giving business to branding companies. How do you justify branding your face on sanitary towels and you don’t manufacture them? We could and should do better than this. 

Youth-led programs are doing a great job in terms of coordinated food donations. An example is the Adopt a Family initiative in Kibera, led by my friend Moses Omondi. A better option I must say, compared to “parading people to give them aid”. This way, you preserve their dignity and protect their health by adhering to the social distancing requirements. The president even lauded the initiative during one of his COVID-19 press briefings.

The Nakuru Senator, Susan Kihika asked on Twitter if we still have a Civil Society, because of the “deafening silence”.

Do we still have a Civil Society in Kenya? Better still, Where did the vibrant Civil Society of yesteryear disappear to? Their silence is deafening.

— Sen. Susan Kihika (@susankihika) June 4, 2020

The Civil Society might be silent, but they are doing a lot during this pandemic. The silence could be because most of our work is away from the cameras. Cameras and photo ops are suited for the show and feed egos rather than feeding the hungry.

Transformation toward dignity 2.png

Dignity in poverty

Transformation toward dignity

Transformation toward dignity

I’ve watched with horror the conditions of living that lack dignity in Mathare slums when it rains from Boniface Mwangi’s video titled Kenya is an epic horror movie. How the houses are flooded, yet the people continue living in them because of lack of alternatives. I couldn’t finish watching the video. I have seen some comments that some of the people have options of going to the village. That may be true, but picture this, going back to the village, you need money for survival.

It has brought back memories of our life in City Carton Slum. I dreaded the rainy season. Our roof used to leak at several points. My room, (the one in the documentary- Abstaining from reality) would be flooded, so I used to put all my valuables on the bed whenever it rained.

Most people, such undignified states are the only source of dignity they have. It’s dignifying to them because at least they can get work in the cities to feed themselves and their families. No matter how small the earnings are. It doesn’t rain every day. Some days, most days it’s dry. So the houses provide shelter.

When I moved from the slum in 2007, it was because I was going to university. Our mother used to wash clothes to feed us. I remember going with her to look for hostels. We looked so rugged that one hostel run by catholic nuns refused to give me accommodation even though my sponsor was willing to pay for my educational expenses fully. Maybe the nun judged by our looks and decided that we could not afford to pay the accommodation fee. She said that I was too old for them to accommodate. I was barely 24. I later found out that they were hosting even ladies who were older than me. Luckily, I got another hostel near Nairobi Hospital, where I lived for one year and later on moved to a single roomed house in Kibera- Karanja area.

I discovered that a different life was possible again. Though the space was small, it was better than the conditions in the slums. Having lived in Buru Buru Estate, in a three bed roomed house all my childhood only for life to take us to the slum was enough humiliation. If my parents never thought of going to the village then, it was to preserve their dignity. This is just to stress my point that for some people, the slum conditions are their only source of dignity. Most don’t want to go to the village to become a burden.

Thank God my parents now live a different life in the village. It took our sacrifice and strong will to convince them to move to the village. Thanks to all my siblings. Every one of us played their part. This is to encourage people who feel that their condition is permanent, that nothing lasts forever.

Do I have a solution to the suffering of people in the slum? I try my best to do the little I can; just like the hummingbird in Prof. Wangari Maathai’s famous story. It’s more like paying it forward, because someone sacrificed to change my life. I would love to do more. I am also exploring, asking myself a lot of questions, and reflecting in the process. This is why such videos are devastating to me.

Juls’ reflections.

COVID-19 graph

COVID-19 has disrupted our lives, but we shall overcome

COVID-19 infographic

COVID-19 infographic courtesy of supply chain beyond

What an interesting week to be a new employee at a company. I got a new job. My first assignment at a diverse and big organization. It’s both exciting and frightening. That’s it for the good news for now. This week Kenya announced three confirmed cases of COVID-19. Additional cases are being confirmed with time. Safety measures have to be taken by everyone.

Before that,  I must confess that I tried ignoring the stories on social media and stats of global infections. I stopped watching TV some time ago, so I have been living in a bubble of sorts. Now it has hit home. Here’s where the fright comes. I observed how people were following the protocols to the letter.

At the gate, I was welcomed by guards and instructed to sanitize my hands before proceeding to the building. I constantly have to remind myself not to shake hands. At least this is not such a big problem for me because I greet people with the left hand, and usually avoid doing so if I can.

Yesterday a colleague was assuring me that the team is not usually so distant. That the circumstances have forced them to practice social distancing. Of course, I understand. They are doing so for everyone’s safety. Even mine!

Presently, all classes have been cancelled or taken online. Several employers, including mine, are testing remote working.

Featured image credits. COVID-19 Data pack

Habits to change

The problem is reminding myself not to touch my face. Every time I remember the instructions not to touch my face, an itch develops, either on my nose or eyes. It seems that I am not the only one who is experiencing this phenomenon. A friend said that it is called murphy’s law. This is the flippant proposition that if something can go wrong, it will.

For those of us using public transportation, and we are the majority, it is a struggle not to touch the rails and surfaces. I try not to and only do so when necessary. I should be careful not to fall inside a bus.

Which reminds me of an incidence this past Friday. The bus I was travelling in from town, nearly caused an accident. There was a young man who fell off while he was alighting, and the bus kept on moving. We had to shout at the driver to stop. When it was my time to alight, I told the conductor not to let me fall. I had to firmly remind him that he was the one who assisted me to carry my luggage into the bus, so he should not hurry me when alighting. Having a disability that’s not so obvious comes with its challenges, I tell you.

Hoarding supplies

Back to COVID-19. Who knew that hand sanitizers would be flying off the shelves at the rate we are witnessing? There’s a shortage, artificial or otherwise. Human beings are interesting. People who had the purchasing power rushed to supermarkets to stock supplies. Others in a panic decided to clear everything, not thinking that everyone needs to be safe. Maybe I would have fallen in this category if I had the money too. I did some introspection after calling the people ‘selfish’.

Safety measures

Safety measures to protect yourself: wash your hands with soap and water, maintain social distancing, avoid crowded spaces, practice respiratory hygiene. If you feel sick or suspect a case, stay at home and call the Ministry of Health Toll Free helpline: 0800 721, if you suspect you might have the symptoms of COVID-19.

A Tale of Two Cities: A Story of the French Revolution by Charles Dickens, starts with this excerpt:

It was the best of times,
It was the worst of times.
It was the age of wisdom,
It was the age of foolishness,
It was the epoch of belief,
It was the epoch of incredulity,
It was the season of Light,
It was the season of Darkness,
It was the spring of hope,
It was the winter of despair,

We are living in interesting times all over again.